How can I give myself a tattoo? – Taking Matters into Your Own Hands
There comes a time in many a persons life when they find themselves asking questions which are deserving of answers which border scorn and ridicule. The question, how can I give myself a tattoo, isn’t one of them. For it doesn’t border on the need for ridicule, it downright demands it.
Welcome to the world of what a grandfather used to illuminate with the saying, ‘What the heck were you thinking boy?’
Now sure there are legitimate reasons to tattoo ones self. For instance, a lot of tattoo artists tattoo themselves. Of course they don’t usually find themselves searching the net asking how to do it. Usually, by that point, they are already practicing or engaging in something they know how to do. It would seem only reasonable that a person who sells tattoos would themselves be covered in them as well. So if the artist is right handed, chances are a lot of the artwork on their left arm and other places reachable by the right hand might be self-created.
Having said all that, a few people, still want to know how to tattoo themselves. Well it’s pretty easy actually. If you have some money, you can just buy a tattoo kit out of a magazine or off of the Internet. A wide range of home tattoo kits exist with everything you could possibly need to do your own tattoos. There are multiple colors of inks and even fake skin to practice tattooing on.
In then end remember the question, how can I give myself a tattoo, is the first rung on a ladder of problems such as bad tattoos, scars, infections, blood diseases and ultimately doing your best to winning a Darwin award. This, by the way, is not the kind of award you want. Make sure you have a steady hand and lots of practice on fake skin before you start tattooing the real thing.
How can I get paid to get a tattoo? – Earning Money for Body Art
When people ask, how can I get paid to get a tattoo, the first answer that comes to mind is, ‘The same way you get paid for hitting yourself in the groin with a hammer. Be a moron.’
Now in all fairness, there are situations where a person might get paid to get tattoos which don’t require the person to be a complete nincompoop. Overall, most of the tattoo-for-money schemes seem to require it.
For instance there was the guy who tattooed a picture of a plate of food on his head for a restaurant chain commercial and ad campaign. He probably felt the payment was fair. Maybe he likes breakfast at that restaurant a lot or maybe he’s had one too many blows to the skull. Only his neurosurgeon knows for sure.
There was another eatery which told people if they got a tattoo of the restaurant logo, they could eat for free. Since it didn’t require an entire noggin tattoo of over easy eggs staring at the sky like a strange alien with white and yellow eyes, quite a few people jumped on that bandwagon pretty quickly. There were so many that the offer was soon rescinded so the place wouldn’t go out of business. The lesson here is: never underestimate the average human’s willingness to do stupid things for free food.
Not every tattoo which someone was paid to receive is an ill conceived display of sub par IQ. For instance, let’s say you are an actor and there is a scene in a movie where the character you play is supposed to get a tattoo. Special effects could probably fake it up to look real enough but then, if it’s a tattoo you actually want, why not stick the producers for a few extra bucks and tell them you would be willing to go that extra mile to make sure the film is as real as possible. Some actors keep their costumes or props and this is sort of like, just a bit more extreme.
So remember, instead of asking yourself: how can I get paid to get a tattoo, ask yourself ‘How can I get paid to get a tattoo without it turning into a badge of stupidity?’ The answer: It’s not easy.
